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THREE STICKS OF CELERY ...



Deuteronomy 5:21 tells us: “You shall not covet your neighbour’s wife …”   The following report appeared in a Boston, England, newspaper in 1887




KISSING ANOTHER MAN’S WIFE.

At Melton Mowbray Petty Sessions on Tuesday, before Mr A. Duncan, (chairman), Major Orme, and Mr R Dalgliesh.

Richard D—-,  bricklayer, Asfordby was charged with assaulting Naomi M—-, married woman, of the same place on the 29th January.  Complainant stated that on the day named, she went into defendants house which joined hers, to pay her rent.  While there defendant gave her a box of figs, and as she was leaving he put his arms around her and kissed her.  She went home and told her husband.  In cross-examination by defendant, complainant says she ate some of the figs when she got home, and so did her husband.  She knew that sounds could be distinctly heard through the wall, and she remembered on one occasion rapping at the wall to call her husband.  She knew that sounds could be distinctly heard through the wall and she remembered  on one occasion rapping at the wall to call her husband home when he was sitting with the defendant.  George M----, husband of complainant, said he went to see the defendant on the following Sunday evening about the matter.  Defendant said he did not mean any harm, it was only excessive. (laughter.)  In cross-examination, witness said he only had one of the figs.  When complainant went to pay the rent it was about half -past eight.  Defendant said that might be, as he had two clocks neither of which would go.  Witness, continuing, said it was not true that his wife had knocked at the wall for him.  On the night he called on defendant he was sober.  Some time ago he had presented defendant with three sticks of celery and defendant had returned the compliment with a large Spanish onion. (Laughter.)  Witness had offered to make it up with defendant for a sum of money, but defendant had refused.  The bench imposed a fine of 10/- and 11/- costs.
(Reproduced from the Boston Guardian of February 19th, 1887)



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